You know when you are on to a winner when the sign
on the wall in the bar reads:
Men: no shoes, no shirt, no service
Women: no shoes, no shirt, free drinks
Actually, I just made that up but it is funny if you
are under twenty five, male and slighlty intellectually
…..or just so awash with testosterone you can’t
think straight !
To everyone else I make no apologies since the G-man
does what he wants
Anyway, he recently pitched up in a real locals hang out…..
‘Osteria Ca’ Cornaro’
This is where old men are dispatched by their long-
suffering wives to spare them from being driven crazy
by the silly old sods !
So they end up playing cards…..
…..drinking very cheap but decent wine
…..and talking the language they are all completely
…..Bollocks ! ! ! ! !
These are the men that in their minds can still sock to
any lady that is still breathing…..
…..but in reality can’t even spell viagra let alone
remember but to do with an erection should it arrive !
Bless them !
I love the fact that most of them get dressed up and properly
primped to go to the bar to hang about with a bunch of old…
…..well, farts to out it bluntly
Actually, it doesn’t matter
They are all lovely and they binge in talking the talk and
revel in telling the lies they tell
And there is laughter, lots of laugh out loud laughter
On the day ‘Ca’ Cornaro’ was buzzing…..
A huge party had formed outside in the courtyard seating area
These were not the old men but a much younger crowd
They kept coming in and ordering beers and litres of wine
And plates and plates of tagliere (salami, cheese and bread)
It was a Friday so I assumed it had been payday and they were
celebrating another month in fruitful employ
There were tattoos a plenty…..
…..and black was back…..
…..Either they were a biker gang or they were dressed alla
Tom Ford…..’you can have any colour you like as long as it’s
…..Hmmmm…..that might have been Henry Ford
As the afternoon wore on the drinking and eating progressed to
dancing and singing
This was one hell of a pay day !
Perhaps it was bonus day ?
The G-meister looked on fascinated, entertained and amused
until it was time to get the bill (il conto) and make tracks
While waiting for the reckoning G decided to engage the old
biffer in a bit of banter…..
‘The Italians really know how to party,’ he ventured
‘The party in the courtyard. They know how to have fun’
‘You mean the group in the garden?’
‘Yes. Is it someone’s birthday or has someone won the lottery?’
The woman suddenly looked very serious and leant her head
towards the G-man
In a whisper she said, ‘It’s a wake. You know, the party after
Taxi ! Scotty ! Beam me up !
So the moral to this story is if you are going to pop your clogs
then best to do it where they throw you a good party afterwards
…..don’t pop your clogs !