The Old Gits edition

First, a lesson

Why ?

Because some of you are too young or too foreign to know

what a git is

The Gits were actually a US punk band active in the late

1980s and early 1990s whose lead singer was raped and

murdered

R.I.P. Mia Zapata

Interestingly, their original name was actually…..

‘Snivelling Little Rat Faced Gits’

This proved to be a little bit of a mouthful for radio

DJs and music fans in general…..

…..so they dropped the preamble…..

…..and became the GITS !

Anyway, rare as it is the G-man has digressed

A git is an English term of insult…..

…..on a level with a prat…..

…..and less pejorative than a berk

…..and is often prefixed by the adjective ‘old’

It means senile, incompetent or even plain elderly

So an ‘old git’ is really just a repetition of the

word old !

The G-ster was in need of a parking space in an

Italian town last week

Space selected, Giulietta parked but ticket needed

So straight to the ticket dispenser

Here his troubles began…..

There were complicated instructions on how to pay by

bank card…..

BUT no mention of paying with good old readies or

shrapnel

Clutching a handful of Euro coins and happy to part

with said ‘beer money’ the G-man tried to insert the

coins in the money-eater

It appeared to be jammed !

Then along came the first old git (Italian Branch)

I explained the problem so the I.O.G. (Italian Old

Git) leapt into the breach only to be defeated

Then along came a second I.O.G.

Same story !

So there we were: the three of us

Like something out of ‘Last of the Summer Wine’, BBC,

1973-2010 (the series ended because all the actors

actually died in real life of old age ! ! !)

Scratching our bonces and all soundly beaten

All of us with a sweaty palm of 1 and 2 Euro coins

Nobody could work out how to pay by cash and…..

…..there were only instructions on how to pay with

plastic

Finally, in desperation one of the I.O.G. pressed

‘ANNULLA’

Bingo ! ! ! ! !

Everything reset

The coin slot opened up

An I.O.G. pushed in a 2 Euro coin that was accepted

The green (GO) button was pressed and…..

…..a ticket was printed for a 2 hour stay

BINGO ! ! ! ! !

So if you want to pay by cash you just stuff your money

in and press ‘GO’

But why in the name of God didn’t it say that

PORCO DIO ! (rough translation would be bollocks)

I suppose the answer is WE are being trained to be a

cash-less society and then the local council won’t have

to pay some monkey to empty the cash from the meters

Cash is King !

But its days are numbered

G.

Standard

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