First, a lesson
Because some of you are too young or too foreign to know
what a git is
The Gits were actually a US punk band active in the late
1980s and early 1990s whose lead singer was raped and
R.I.P. Mia Zapata
Interestingly, their original name was actually…..
‘Snivelling Little Rat Faced Gits’
This proved to be a little bit of a mouthful for radio
DJs and music fans in general…..
…..so they dropped the preamble…..
…..and became the GITS !
Anyway, rare as it is the G-man has digressed
A git is an English term of insult…..
…..on a level with a prat…..
…..and less pejorative than a berk
…..and is often prefixed by the adjective ‘old’
It means senile, incompetent or even plain elderly
So an ‘old git’ is really just a repetition of the
word old !
The G-ster was in need of a parking space in an
Italian town last week
Space selected, Giulietta parked but ticket needed
So straight to the ticket dispenser
Here his troubles began…..
There were complicated instructions on how to pay by
BUT no mention of paying with good old readies or
Clutching a handful of Euro coins and happy to part
with said ‘beer money’ the G-man tried to insert the
coins in the money-eater
It appeared to be jammed !
Then along came the first old git (Italian Branch)
I explained the problem so the I.O.G. (Italian Old
Git) leapt into the breach only to be defeated
Then along came a second I.O.G.
Same story !
So there we were: the three of us
Like something out of ‘Last of the Summer Wine’, BBC,
1973-2010 (the series ended because all the actors
actually died in real life of old age ! ! !)
Scratching our bonces and all soundly beaten
All of us with a sweaty palm of 1 and 2 Euro coins
Nobody could work out how to pay by cash and…..
…..there were only instructions on how to pay with
Finally, in desperation one of the I.O.G. pressed
Bingo ! ! ! ! !
The coin slot opened up
An I.O.G. pushed in a 2 Euro coin that was accepted
The green (GO) button was pressed and…..
…..a ticket was printed for a 2 hour stay
BINGO ! ! ! ! !
So if you want to pay by cash you just stuff your money
in and press ‘GO’
But why in the name of God didn’t it say that
PORCO DIO ! (rough translation would be bollocks)
I suppose the answer is WE are being trained to be a
cash-less society and then the local council won’t have
to pay some monkey to empty the cash from the meters
Cash is King !
But its days are numbered