The Italian Rule edition

Time for a little history lesson

Time was when the Italians ruled the world

The Roman Empire lasted 507 years ending in 476 AD

Not a bad effort on their part, they conquered what we know today

as 54 countries and comprised 1.7 million square miles…..

…..trust the G-man, that’s a lot…..

…..However…..

…..that was then and this is now !

Nowadays, the Italians (the direct descendants) have

trouble running themselves

Moreover, perhaps as a result of this loss of status and RULE…..

…..they treat rules in an idiosyncratic way ! ! !

Back to the schoolroom

Modern Italians believe that…..

Firstly, there are no RULES (you could say that’s rule 1)

Secondly, if one should find one then you break it instantly…..

…..you could say that’s rule 2

So let me illustrate this in two ways…..

…..one in relation to motorised transport

…..the other in relation to fidelity

Take cars…..

In a curious take on the ‘get ahead society’ an Italian…..

…..sees a car in front as an opportunity

…..and not as an obstacle

Firstly, as an opportunity to break any law that says that

for safety reasons overtaking is prohibited…..

…..like a blind corner !

…..like a hill !

Sometimes there’s not even an actual law to ignore…..

…..simply the law of common sense

…..or perhaps the basic desire to live ! ! ! ! !

Take fog (the ‘challenge’ in Italian called ‘la nebbia’)

A simple matter of practically zero visibilty presents the average

Italian with endless slow moving obstacles that have to be passed

Slow moving ?

Well, I was one of them last night because I couldn’t see a sodding

thing ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Italians believe fog lights are unbelievably stupid and annoying…..

‘It makes you think the car in front is breaking’

HELLO !

In an innovative (and perversely stupid twist) on road safety the

Italians have erected (more on erections later) signs that tell

you your speed and then tell you how many points you will get

if you are caught at said speed…..

…..the more you exceed the limit, the more points !

STUPID IS AS STUPID DOES !

The Italian mindset is that the faster you go…..

…..Yes, you guessed it

…..the more points you avoid if you don’t get caught ! ! !

HELLO ! !

So to fidelity…..(a sort of moral law)

The Italian men believe it applies to their loyal and endlessly

adoring spouse…..

…..but not to all the other trollops out there who are all prey

HELLO ! ! !

See ‘trollop’, read any woman the Italian male didn’t marry

HELLO ! ! ! !

…..and I mean ANY (except mama and sister)

Oh, and they (the men) are automatically exempt

So La Dolce Vita is a country full of challenges and instead of

rules they have got bureaucracy (and God but he’s fighting a

losing battle)…..

It’s probable they would have been better of sticking to rules ! ! ! ! !

G

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