The G-man pulled back the curtains this morning
…..and spying blue skies
…..immediately slipped into his shorts and set out for his
constitutional pant down to the sea
He had barely gone 400 metres when he was hailed by
a foreign female voice…..
‘Sir, sir, excuse me’
Possible damsel in distress…..check
He hove over…..
Sitting in a car and looking like she wanted to destroy the
item in her hand, she said…..
‘I am looking for Leeds Castle but this (object in hand) GPS
has made me go round Herne Bay five times. It won’t let me
get out of Herne Bay ! ! ! ! !’
I leant in the car window and couldn’t resist saying…..
‘Has it occurred to you the universe is trying to tell you something?’
I think she had left her sense of humour in Canada because she
didn’t laugh !
The G-man did his bit for international relations and set her on her
escape route out of Hernia Bay
So back to the title of this post…..
The title refers to the Stephen Hawking type of black holes rather
than the Calcutta variety
Actually the word HOLE would do nicely
Enough said !
Incredibly, in 1883, Herne Bay was considered by the government
to be the ‘healthiest watering place in England’
Its only economy then was tourism or the ‘healthmaking’ industry
as it was known at the time
Even more incredibly, the first reference to an individual going to
the coast for health reasons (sea air and sea bathing) dates back
…..Yes, you guessed it…..
…..Said person, Judge Finiox by name, went to Herne Bay
So in the immortal words…..
‘Where did it all go wrong?’
Nowadays, Hernia Bay boasts more tattoo parlours per capita
than any other town in the country ! ! !
It boasts more mobility scooters per capita than any other
country on the entire planet ! ! ! ! !
Oh…..it does have one G-man
But not for long because this time next week he will be doing a
Peter, Paul & Mary
‘Leaving on a jet plane’ was a 1969 hit for the group who
couldn’t come up with a proper name for themselves so
they just went by their christian names, Peter, Paul & Mary
Watch out Bassangelese ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !