The Love Lesson edition

This post might not be about what you think !

It’s actually about pigeage

No, this is not some sick fraternity game played out

by hubristic American male students

Actually, it’s about the absence of pigeage

You see, the G-man has pitched up in Tuscany to learn

more about one of life’s great pleasures

No, not that !

Wine

He figured he drank enough of the stuff, it was time to

find out more about it

True, his hopes of seeing exotic Italian women trampling

the juice out of the grapes was slim from the get go

Can you imagine Sophia Loren or Monica Bellucci holding

up their skirts while their feet get funky with the ‘uva’

Well one can but dream

Reality would more likely have been Lucille Ball ! ! !

Remember the 1956 episode of ‘I Love Lucy’ in which

she gets in an enormous vat of grapes ? ? ?

Me neither ! ! !

But you can youtube it under ‘Lucy’s Italian Movie’

It is truly funny

Anyway, no Lucy, no Sophia and no Monica

Just an evil-looking machine called a pigatrice that does

the work of three hundred Italian babes in about three seconds

This arm-mangling contraption must have featured in some

of the Mafia’s more extreme moments of persuasion

So all his romantic notions of plucking the juicy berries from

the vine under the Tuscan sun and waving a magic wand

over them to miraculously turn them into the sweet nectar

…..ARE DEAD !

This was hard, dirty, backbreaking work

The G-ster slept for twelve hours last night

TWELVE ! ! ! ! !

And this was without the benefit of copious amounts of

alcohol and a marathon session of ‘etc etc etc’ ! ! ! ! !

Just simply bolloxed

Back to the love aspect of this post…..

Dinner was a veal steak cooked in the raked out embers

of a real Tuscan fire…..

I’m lying

The meat was momentarily wafted over the embers and

delivered rare to the G-man’s plate !

This was then washed down by a 1996 Taurasi and a 2002

Morellino dI Scansano

Died ?

I’m in HEAVEN…..

…..or PARADISO as they prefer to call it round here !

I’m definitely in LOVE

G.

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