The Lardy edition

If you have never eaten Lardy cake then…..

…..to coin a phrase…..

…..’you haven’t lived’

This is a delicacy (probably not the best descriptor)…..

…that is found in some of the southern counties of England

…that goes by a variety of different aliases

…that each county claims to have the best and most original

recipe

…but that all have one common denominator…..

…..it is heaven on a tray in a bakery’s shop window !

The G.-man was on ‘mum-sitting’ duty in the depths of

Gloucestershire when out on a sortie to buy the daily

paper for said mum he was stopped dead in his tracks

Baker ahoy !

A fully loaded tray of Lardy cake…..!

Halleluja !

…..fighting back the temptation to lob a brick through

the window and make off with the lot…..

…..he strode in and bought a box full…..

…..then whizzed home as excited as a turkey that’s just

heard that Christmas has been cancelled

This food heaven is described as…..

…..’oozing with goo’ by the baker’s plastic label

Bless their alliterative cotton socks ! ! ! ! !

Anyway it’s made by layering rolled layers of dough with

LARD

SUGAR

SPICES

RAISINS (& CURRANTS)

and eaten as a treat on high days with tea or coffee

As you have probably guessed it could be force-fed to an

anorexic for a week and probably result in the addition of

2-3 stones (14-42lbs)

It’s not actually possible to measure the calorific content…..

…..a powerful enough machine is yet to be invented !

But before you recoil in horror…..

…..be aware that the Queen serves it at her summer garden

parties…..

…..and if it’s good enough for Betty…..

…..it’s good enough for the Groove-meister ! ! !

One last thing…..

…..this must not be eaten every day…..

…..like I said, ‘high days’ and festivals (harvest) etc

…..if you choose to ignore this advice I can assure you

…..when you (boys) look down in the shower…..

…..you will not be able to see ‘Mr Man’

…..you (girls) should definitely not be asking the question…..

…..’does my bum look big in this ?’

Buon appetito !

G.

Advertisements
Standard

One thought on “The Lardy edition

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s