Alternate Title: The Banned For Being Boring edition
Still no sign of Big Joe…..
Still optimistic……………..(the old stockbroker in the G.-man)
Now the casa Groover is in Herne on the Costa del Kent………
Famous for being the birthplace of Nigel Farage, the
home of the world’s first micropub and the birthplace
of a great little microbrewery
So much in such a little place !
The brewery got well and truly grooved today…..
Situated down a country lane in a field, the Bleangate
Brewery is where Goody Ales are born…….
…..the sign at the entrance reads ‘This way to Heaven’
…..very apposite !
And this being the 21st century the master brewer is actually
a mistress brewer……
…..the technical term is a ‘brewerette’
Karen Goody saw the light in 2008 and together
with her henchman, Peter, she has been producing amusing-
sounding English ales all (bar the first) incorporating the word
The G.-favourite is ‘Good Heavens’
But at Yuletide you can imbibe ‘Good King Wenceslas’
At Easter you can enjoy ‘Good Friday’
In the summer you can knock back ‘Good Innings’ (it’s a
cricket thing !)
In the autumn ‘Good Harvest’ is available
The all-year-round varieties fill in the gaps between the
Like ‘Good Health’ and ‘Good Sheppard’ and the very first
beer produced called ‘Genesis’ which is a porter-style little
The brewery is technically a very large shed but that is where
the magic happens
Karen and Peter scoot around in matching white wellies looking
like biological scientists from a sci-fi movie
There was a wonderful smell of burning wood coming from a large
black furnace just outside the brew-barn……….
…..the beginning of a ‘good(y) brew’
Curiously Goody Ales are not served (much) in the micropub
called The Butchers Arms in the village of Herne
A mystery all round………
But this is an establishment where a sign on the outside of the
‘Chatham House Rule Applied’
I was !
It’s an historical thing that essentially means you can repeat
anything you hear inside the pub as long as you don’t name
names or affiliations or indeed anyone present at the time
You can tell it like it is or even fable-it-up with impunity
The other curiosity in said pub is a large blackboard that
is headed ‘Banned Board’
Today beneath the title it read…..
‘Nigel, 4 weeks’
After a little preamble the Groover elicited Nigel’s ‘faux pas’
‘Easy’ was the landlord’s answer, ‘He was boring’
This is actually a place where being boring is a sin
The explanation is simple………………
Micropubs are small places where only English ale is
served and the whole point is the pub is a forum, an open
place where everyone has the right to be heard………
…..just don’t be BORING ! ! !
Which brings me to the landlord’s own personal motto which
goes by the acronym…..
This stands for ‘no fu*king lager’
So if you were boring by nature and a lager drinker by
…..you would probably be taken outside and shot !
Goody Ales are going to withdraw the ‘Good Health’ variety of
their beers because a government department believes it is making
a false claim……………………
…..Errrr………..isn’t ‘Good Health’ another way of saying ‘Cheers’
LORD, SAVE ME !